


An Asgard Home Companion

by artyartie



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen, Good Loki, National Public Radio
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-08
Updated: 2014-06-08
Packaged: 2018-02-03 22:36:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1758683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artyartie/pseuds/artyartie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The only thing more annoying than an NPR pledge drive is a certain god of mischief who can't stop listening to it.  One shot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Asgard Home Companion

After a weekend's NPR binge, this fic is what happened.

***

"Loki-"

The exiled demi-god in question grunted and sipped at his Hayden Planetarium mug.

"Loki-"

Finally, a pair of green eyes looked up.  "Stark, you know the ritual."

"There's a ten story carnivorous slimeball moving up the Hudson that doesn't give a crap about the ritual."

Loki glanced down at his watch.  "If it's still in the river it means the only thing under threat is a few boatloads of overbearing tourists.  I'm sure the lot of you can manage a half-hour against it on your own."

Tony shook his head. "Oh, we can manage them.  It's the principle of the thing.  Because I'm a man of principles."

Loki's brow rose.  "I think you put on the wrong costume this morning."

"You can't tell me instead of kicking the Blob's ass you'd rather stay home and sip coffee and listen to the radio."

Loki smiled as Peter Sagal's voice broke into rhyme:

" _Like an onion whose layers are peeled_

_And innermost secrets revealed_

_This top secret crew_

_Has reason to rue_

_An ironic acronym-"_

_"_ S.H.I.E.L.D.," Loki finished, with a smug smile.

Tony snorted.  "Lucky."

 

***

 

Bruce was as glad as anyone one of Loki's 'conditions' was not having his magic, but right now, a little teleportation spell would be handy.

The Quinjet's engines were toast, thanks to a Hydra rocket, Bruce's shoes were Hulked up beyond wearing or repair, and now he was stuck on at least a two hour cab trip with Loki.

"Far be it from me to question the upkeep of your car, but you do hear that rattle, don't you?"

"Got it checked out last week," the cabbie said, all clipped tones.  "It's fine."

"Well, you may want to rethink the competency of your mechanic, because that sound would indicate this vehicle is anything but."

"My mechanic's my brother, so you best be shutting up."

But if there was one thing Loki was supremely bad at, it was shutting up.  "I'm just saying this as a passenger, one who would like to make it back to the City sometime this millennium, and I'm not entirely uninformed."

"Oh year?" the cabbie asked.  "And what makes you such a damn genius about cars?"

Loki smiled and cleared his throat. 

\--

If there was ever a moment Bruce would be justified in Hulking out, standing on a deserted stretch of highway, shoeless, with an indignant Loki would be it.  "For the next time we have to share a cab, which is never, by the way," Bruce said, feeling the asphalt prickling at his feet.  "Don't mention Car Talk."

 

***

 

Jane groaned and dropped her head in her hands.  "I sound like a crackpot."

"You did not," Thor said, as he wrapped an arm around her shoulder.  "Though I know not what a crackpot is, I'm assured you sounded nothing like one."

Jane's fingers gripped tightly at her hair.  "I sounded like Doc Brown.  I may as well have thrown in something about a flux capacitor."

Thor looked to Jane then Loki with a quizzical expression.

Loki sighed.

"If it makes you feel any better, Dr. Emmett Brown, however fictional, was right in his theories and execution of time travel.  And if you sounded radical it's merely because your science is so far beyond the reach of your human counterparts." As Loki spoke Jane poked her head up, looking a little incredulously at Thor's little brother. 

"You watched Back to The Future?" she asked.

"Stark suggested it for Captain Rogers.  The first and third were moderately entertaining.  The second was, how do you mortals put it?  Shameless product placement.  But I have listened to enough Science Fridays to know you are light years beyond any other guest.  When you do create an Einstein-Rosen bridge, or an Einstein-Rosen-Foster bridge as I imagine it will be called, this interview will be sign of your genius."

Both Thor and Jane stared at Loki.

"Of course, that it took human beings so very long to discover such basic truths about the universe and even longer to put them to practical use, I mean genius in the loosest of ways.  Competency would be a better term.

Jane groaned and dropped her head back in her hands.

 

***

 

The rest of the team gave Loki a wide berth when he listened to the radio.  Steve should have too, but he couldn't help it.  There was something familiar and comforting, in a world not complicated with images, much less HD or 3D or whatever. 

"You like this show?"  Steve settled down into a chair opposite Loki, the penthouse flooded with the ruddy light of sunset. 

Loki shrugged.  "It is enjoyable.  Even if it seems this Lake Wobegon is a bit of a fiction."

Steve chuckled.  "Knew a few boys from Minnesota.  Guess he reminds me of them, even if I don't get all the English major jokes.  But it reminds me of before."

"I can't imagine many things do."

"Nope," Steve said.  "Suppose most things have to change, but nice that a few things don't.  Or don't change much."

Loki smiled as he stretched.  "For old time's sake, I could try and push you or Stark out the window."

Steve shook his head.  The low wailing of a saxophone filled the room.  "Maybe after Guy Noir."

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
